Mike has been silently following my blogging journey, and after my last post he said it would be a great addition to add my own gratitude at the end of each entry.
I think that’s a fabulous idea! Like I said in my self care post, I thought gratitude journals were bull. I was honestly offended when my doctor and therapist were promoting them so much when I was so deep in my depression. I want to drive in the lake, and you want me to write down things I’m thankful for? Seems dumb, but whatever.
And then I tried it, and it worked. No one had ever explained to me before that being intentional about listing things were grateful for literally re-wires your brain to think about happy things. Bam! Best medicine ever (you know, aside from my antidepressant 😆).
Mike and I also have the kids tell us what they are thankful for every night at the dinner table. Like their mama, they were a little resistant at first. Now they often fight over who gets to go first!
I am grateful for my career, my family, my children, and my husband.
I have the coolest job ever (for me – totally respect the fact that it isn’t for everyone!), and I work for such an amazing hospital that is very supportive of their employees.
My family, extended and otherwise, is pretty fantastic. Everyone is relatively independent, but we can reach out and get a hold of anyone if we needed to. My mother in law keeps to herself but is ALWAYS there if we need her. My dad is my biggest life coach, and always has the best insight and advice – whether or not I choose to take it 😂
My kids… They are the funniest, most strong willed, intelligent people I know. It makes my heart swell just to think about all of their individual quirks and talents that they bring to our family.
And my husband… he is my best friend, and I can talk to him about anything – even if it upset him, he will hear me out and walk through me with it. He likes to say we’re pretty opposite, which we probably are, but we both bring the best to our marriage and are always helping the other person grow.
Your gratitude journal does not need to be this in depth. I would start by dating your entry, and writing three things that you are grateful in your life. That’s it. Make a commitment to do that for three weeks – because studies have proven that it takes 21 days to form a new habit – and be intentional about writing down three things you are grateful for every night before bed. Or when you wake up. Or on your lunch break. Just make sure you get it done, daily!
I would like to stress again how difficult this was for me in the beginning – and even sometimes now! I am a rather stubborn person (I can hear Mike gasping in shock as he reads this), and I wanted to carry around all of that anger. I didn’t want to let go of it, because I felt wronged.
Let me tell you something. The only person that is affected by your negativity is you. You’re the one that has to pack up those bad feelings and drag them around with you. Sometimes no matter how badly you think you need an apology or some form of vindication for your emotions, letting go of those feelings frees you from carrying them around. And then you are just that – free. It isn’t up to us to demand things from others. I’m only responsible for me, and my actions. No matter how upset or offended I get, my negative attitude only affects me. The people in my life aren’t going to stick around to be my emotional punching bag – they’re going to go find a happier environment, even if it’s in another room.
As soon as I realized I was the only one suffering from my negative attitude, I wanted to see how the other side lived. So I went through the motions. I started writing every night three things that I was grateful for. The first few nights I sat and stared at my empty notebook, because I didn’t even know what to even write. I was so hung up on all of the negative things, I couldn’t find a single thing to be grateful about!
It’s hard at first. But it is so, so worth it. Trust the process. Put in the time. And see how you feel in three weeks.